See… What Had Happened Was…

All jokes aside for a minute. A debate with an ex of mine, who I actually met, via online, via MySpace, about eight years ago had inspired this blog. Mind you, if I never experienced the advice I am about to give through the life I lead, it wouldn’t be really efficient. Would it?

Note, before I was even civil with this particular ex, we went through hell and back, regardless of the side you want to take on the events. It took YEARS to just end the love/hate relationship with the drama it involved and just be mutual without the jealousy and soap opera episodes.

Due to these experiences, I firmly found the belief of letting relationships flow naturally and not online dating, so to speak. It took a few rounds on social networking to wake up to the fact, but this day and age, you won’t see me getting flustered by not finding “the one” over an online dating profile. The fact I am focused on getting my own life together permanently has also been my priority.  If someone was meant to be in your life permanently, it’ll happen in your journey outside of the internet whelm. The fact that I keep more in touch with those I have met outside of the social world and in person, exes included, than those I have met through MySpace or other networks should tell you enough of how my life is lived.

Now let me clarify, I am not completely against networking online. I am actually very blessed to have the opportunities to connect with the individuals, mostly business relevant, I have come across through social media and keep in touch with my friends across the world. It would be hypocritical of me to say… “Hey, I am totally against the internet!”… When with my own career I’m trying to plant a foundation for, provides umpteen amounts of internet services, hours, and marketing to get my name and works out across the world. Networking in my field is very important, but again, it’s business, not personal. Not everyone is capable of differentiating those two.

However, there is a just to this whole speculation. Online dating sites or using the internet primarily for relationship purposes. Yeah, they bring more relationships together, but can someone tell me the statistics of how many of those relationships stick out in the end or the percentage of online dating and marriage draws divorces?

That was another portion of the debate. As I am one who is very spectacle of marriage and the meaning of it in this day and age. Paper, pen, and money. That’s all that’s valued in a marriage anymore, that is why I don’t believe in it, for the most part. I don’t see myself walking down an aisle in a white gowned dress in the future, even though I have friends who claim I will.

Another thing I don’t understand is honestly, how does one fall for just a two-dimensional profile of one’s account on either dating sites, Facebook, Twitter, Google+, etc. If I could go back and remember, I was ignoring the red flags of an individual and paying more attention to the surveys and questionnaires of someone to see the compatibility rating.

If you are doing that at this moment, please stop. If not, I understand that in life, to each their own. From my own experience, that’s how I fell so easily in the past. Pictures may say a 1,000 words, but they can also say a 1,000 lies at the same time.

It’s not only easy to photo shop nowadays, it’s also easy for one to fill out fake information than to be honest and upfront from the beginning. I think Brad Paisley’s song, “Online.” has a better visual on that argument. I have come across individuals on dating sites and other social websites that are hesitant on the realism of their own lives. It’s hard not to question those individuals or even trust them, when online, they don’t have any reality to show. Especially when those individuals avoid meet and greets with a number of people, for whatever reason they seem to display at the time and day.

Nowadays, if I do come across a new individual via internet, I am very cautious. I ONLY have ONE personal account, so don’t ask me via Google+ or Twitter if I am single or not, or, for my phone number, because you won’t have it. Like I said in a previous paragraph, it’s business. On my marketing accounts, I  portray as little of my personal life, or clarification of my relationship statuses, as much as possible. I know how social networking can easily portray insecurity and misapprehension to one person or a couple and destroy the relationships. I see it daily. So, I keep those particular two parts of my life out of the spotlight for the safety, privacy, and respect for those in my life to the best of my abilities.

The rest of the personal events I throw in my art is primarily for inspirational and motivational purposes. I am a combat veteran with PTSD, I have been bullied in school, etc.. etc. I am publicizing my artistic abilities to be a beckon, or a lighthouse, so to speak, for those lost ships that are out battling the same tides that I am currently or had fought in the past. Main focus is to awake those who struggle in life that suicide is not the answer. Never is. Nothing else. My Eminem phase is over. I want to inspire lives with the best way I know how too. That’s through my writing and art.

Now let me end this note on Brad Paisley’s “Online”…

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