Follow The Rest of Society & You Will Get Lost

I was going to tell a story about two tails in my household, but I decided to change the topic to the sexism war that seems to be going on and on and on in society nowadays. Sickening if you ask me, but hell I’ll jump on this bandwagon myself as an independent and single woman. There are three main issues when it comes to relationship falls nowadays.

The Expected Looks: I am a prime example to never judge a book by its cover and I have beautiful friends with beautiful souls, who remind me of this. I get looks and majority of society fears to approach me unless I approach them first. If you knew the real me, you know just like a lot of other women and some men, I do have insecurities from time to time. Overall I am confident with myself, yes. But, the media and social networking articles tries to push us to be a certain way. It’s not how I want to live my life.

Here is another stickler of today’s society and I see it in my very own. The whole immaturity issue between females and males. Somehow females feel they need to put themselves out sexually in order to get a man, but is that really the case? Males also think in order to get a good woman, it’s all about their images. If they don’t look like Hollywood material in society, it’s a losing game for that female.

As people have observed about me, yes, I am a tomboy, through and through. I’m not afraid to get dirty. I am not afraid to work with a hammer. I love my X Box. I hate dresses, and with my body figure, I fit better in male/unisex clothing than women’s clothes. However, I make my fashion fit me as a woman. Nonetheless, it doesn’t justify me as a whole though. I do like to dress up every now, even with make-up from  time to time. I love my accessories when it comes to necklaces, scarves, hats, belts, bracelets, etc.

As for my personality, character, and actions, you will see me through with my big heart. I involve myself wholeheartedly with numerous events, fundraisers, charities, & organizations. I also am a sucker for flowers, chocolate, animals, cuddling, relaxation baths, poetry, candles, holding hands, staying in and watching movies with pajamas on, and chivalry. I want to feel secured in my relationship as well, but not to the point of being controlled.  I am more old school when it comes to relationships. I want more of the emotions and intellectual conversations over the sexual exposures. I may not have a lot of cash in my possession, but one thing I learn, the true value is the gold that exists in your heart. I have inspired and influenced many men and women already with just my heart. I also have come across some unsecured situations as well, but it’s life.

And like a woman, my insecurities use to control my life. Sadly, I use to put myself out there, because of the pressure of society. I felt I had to prove my sexuality to people, but I’ve grown. I know who I am and what I want in life and relationships. I am not budging. I have learned it’s okay to know what you are looking for and in order to know, you do have to make trials and errors in your life. I feel I have had enough of those to know exactly I want. If it takes years to be single in order to find my soul mate, so be it. 

Six months ago, I was told I was turning into a “monk” because I wouldn’t allow myself to get involved with anyone or allow myself a “friend with benefits” package. Sorry, my heart doesn’t allow me to half ass my relationships. Is that even fair? I’m sorry, but my package is more than a sexual experience. I am too rich in intellectual tendencies to just jump on a train after pick-up lines like, “Send me pictures.” or “You need to jump on my cock.” I am one who wants to date and court, not just hook up. If you can’t love the one you’re with publicly, then don’t waste your time. I am not saying to put your business out for the paparazzi to feed their hunger like most celebrities do with their own soap operas, but don’t be afraid to tell your friends and family that you want to be with the person you are attracted to.

The Expected Roles: Our generations are clashing with one another instead of evolving with one another and maybe that’s the cause of many segregation, as well as, labels and stereotypes that are displayed. The older school generations think there are entitlements to the sex/gender you represent. Women: housewife material, dish washing champions, Sunday church dresses, etc. Men: house provider, heavy liftin’ jobs, etc.

Males need to stop talking with their little heads and start thinking with their bigger heads when it comes to women. Females need to stop whoring themselves. Females also need to become a bit more independent and confident in themselves with what they want in their life. If you want a true woman, you need to look within their hearts, not the access to their crotches, males. 

Also, end the competitions of who should be what and who should make how much money. Swallow your prides. That’s the only compromise I see we need to make for success in relationships and how males and females should be in society. If you are in a relationship that makes you the bread maker, so be it. As long as you and your mate are in confidence about it. 

Social Media: Also, another issue with social networking and media. Too many people are relying on interwebs instead of real life to date.  I am not perfect. I’ve done it myself in the past, but again, too many errors. I’ve learn you get a better success with relationships when you meet in real life and get involved with one another away from the internet. I love networking world-wide, don’t get me wrong, but don’t expect me to ever fall for someone based on their posts and statuses. Too many fake individuals online nowadays. Too many being people they are not, just to impress the few who are real. So how do you know I’m real? The only way to do that, I guess, is to meet me.

In conclusion, both generations have issues with relationships today based off of the society that the media wants to throw at us. We are only living the lives that the media wants to portray and governments want to display. Why divorces are higher in the ranks than marriages. It’s time to breakaway from those chains and if you are happy in your relationship, more power and love to you all! If not, then maybe there needs to be changes?

Both sexes need to accept one another for who they are and not trying to make them someone they are not. If you aren’t able to compromise comfortably with one another that maybe a red flag in the relationship itself. I’ll remain single until I find one who isn’t intimidated by the lifestyle I’m confidently living in.  I’ll remain single when I find the one who shares the same empathy with life and the world like I do, as well as, shares the same passion. 

2013©H.M. Gautsch

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